Empathy
by rafestark
Summary: Greg bets Catherine she couldn't convince Sara to sleep with her. Even though Catherine wasn't really in it for the money, when she 'wins' and Sara finds out, it all goes horribly wrong.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation and all related plots, characters, and sundry intellectual property are copyright. I do not own them and make no profit from referencing them in the fictional work below._

_Warnings: Sexual references, strippers, coarse language and gambling_

_Note: The below is an attempt to take the standard rom-com trope of 'hooking up for a bet goes wrong' and take it to a darker place. (Having said that, I do love the many iterations of that trope already on ffnet, just wanted to run with it a little differently)_

* * *

They looked up to see Sara leaning against the doorframe. In any other situation she could have laughed at their horrified, deer-in-the-headlights expressions.

After a moment's pause for them to register her presence, Sara strode over and looked pointedly at the cash in Greg's hand.

"That's it? Please." She snorted lightly and grabbed Greg's wallet out of his other hand. "Last time I whored myself out I charged that much _an hour_." She flipped through the bills present and pulled a few out. "You let me touch you for, what...three hours?" Sara enquired of Catherine lightly, before grabbing the cash Greg was still holding and shoving it, with the extra she just took, into Catherine's hand.

"Sara, I..."

"Shut up, Greg." She turned dark eyes on him and he almost choked on his own aspirated saliva as he tried to swallow and take a quick breath at the same time. She was furious.

Turning back to Catherine she continued the one-sided conversation.

"We didn't use protection...that'd cost another fifty..." she pulled out another note and pushed it into the blonde's grasp, "...and roleplaying, that's extra too." She slipped out another couple of notes and handed a now almost-empty wallet to a wide-eyed Greg, who was busy staring at Catherine.

"Hey! There was no role-playing." She denied and quickly assured Greg.

"Sure there was." Sara answered, pulling the cash out of Catherine's hand and quickly counting through it as she spoke. "You played the colleague interested in the one night stand, and I pretended someone might want me for something other than a quick buck."

She handed half of the money back to the blonde and waved hers briefly in the air. "My share of the profits." She smiled thinly.

"Sara, I'm sorry, okay? It was just a stupid bet...but seriously, I need that money to pay my rent." Greg stressed.

"Look at it this way," Sara started walking backwards out of the room, flipping one last time through the bills before shoving them in a pocket, "now you can say we _all _got fucked." And she left.

* * *

Catherine strode into the busy club, looking over the crowd. It definitely wasn't the sleaziest club on the strip, but she had been there during the day accompanying Brass when following a possible lead, and knew the dark lighting, crowd, booze and thumping music hid an otherwise unimpressive venue.

She had taken Nick's advice in trying to find Sara here. Taking in the crowd, she could see why the brunette might choose it as a place to get lost. The blonde made her way through the press of people to the bar, and finally getting the server's attention leaned close.

"I'm looking for someone. Tall, brunette woman – a bit of a regular?" she half-shouted.

"Why you looking?" The other woman asked suspiciously.

"We work together. Is she here or not?" Cath demanded impatiently. She endured a few more moments of scrutiny before getting a nod.

"Last time I saw, she was headed towards the stage." she tilted a glass in the direction intended.

"Thanks." Catherine left a tip on the counter and moved toward a previously unnoticed area of the club. Arriving at the edge of the crowd, she paused to find her target. Glancing around, it was a scene she was well familiar with. Businessmen, college kids and sundry others were watching a strip show. There were a few girls working and so the crowd was spread out along the stage according to preference.

She had expected Sara to be in a dark corner somewhere, nursing her bad mood, or at the very least at the edge of the crowd somewhere. Instead she finally found her in the middle of the floor show with one of the strippers gyrating over her lap and very close to her face. Despite the very sexual position and nakedness of the woman, Sara appeared to be smiling and joking with her while taking in the view. Things were just finishing up as Catherine approached.

"Thanks Lucy." Sara grinned and held a note up which was plucked from her hand.

"My pleasure." The toned young thing in question winked before strutting away. Sara took a long sip out of the glass in front of her and Catherine chose that moment to join her at the table. She saw the surprise and anger chase across Sara's face seconds before the brunette went blank.

"Catherine." Sara acknowledged and threw back the rest of her drink, replenishing it from a bottle on the table.

"You got the whole bottle?" Catherine asked, playing for time to get a feel for Sara's mood.

"I recently came into a bit of money." Sara's wide grin was slightly sloppy and her eyes a little glazed.

"Come on." Catherine sat back. "Do you really want to take Greg's money? Isn't it a little too close to actual prostitution, money for sex?" She asked seriously.

"And you didn't think of that while you were _making_ the bet?" Sara demanded, unimpressed.

"I didn't take it."

"Good for you." Sara affirmed with a raise of her glass. "You got standards, even if they did arrive a little too late to make a difference." Catherine's eyes narrowed, but Sara ignored her anger and continued. "But me, well...it wouldn't be the first time. First time I didn't have to give someone more than a 50% cut, maybe!" She grinned again.

Catherine was torn between concern and disbelief. "You're telling me you...were a prostitute." She stated. Sara shrugged.

"Lotsa people who get money for sex that aren't what you'd call proper whores. So is that what you're doing here? Trying to get Greg's rent back? Why not just bet him double or nothing that he can't fuck Nick?"

"I wanted to apologise. It honestly wasn't about the money or even getting one over on Greg." The blonde tried.

"So, what? About getting one over on me?" Sara took another swig, her arm movements a little lazy. "Just about getting the leg over and proving I'm not immune to your charms, or was it more about demeaning me so I can finally understand how you've suffered being seen as a sex object rather than a serious professional?"

Catherine swallowed her fury at Sara's deliberate provocations, wanting to make herself heard properly. "No. I...it was pride, I guess. I told Greg I could get anyone I wanted, he said women would see right through me, wouldn't be interested." She sighed at how hollow the reasoning sounded now. "I guess I wanted to prove I still had it. Then when he nominated you as the woman in question...well I wanted to back out but..."

"You can't show any weakness?" Sara suggested with only a hint of scathing.

"Something like that."

"Guess I should have been smart enough to make the same choice." Sara grinned broadly, but behind the humour Catherine could see deep and abiding self-loathing. "Well, I'm so glad I could sacrifice my dignity and professional respect for your pride."

"Oh come on." Catherine answered. "That's a bit much isn't it?"

Sara snorted her amusement. "I didn't just walk in on you and Greg passing cash. I heard it first from one of the guys at PD. He assured me that he wouldn't screw me even if Greg paid him twice as much." Sara shared calmly.

"Oh God." Catherine had previously held hopes that the grapevine would never get hold of the details, given that only she and Greg had known about the bet. She felt her anger rising at whoever may have spread the word around, but it was immediately defused with shame. How could she be angry at someone for making public what she was foolish enough to do?

"Forget about it." Sara waved a hand dismissively, almost smacking Catherine in the face by accident. "It was a nice night. You have plenty to be proud about."

One of the strippers fresh from her set strode up to them, eyeing Catherine menacingly. "Honey, this lady botherin' you?"

"Only for the last few years. Why?" Sara asked, looking up at her. "You got a gun hidden on you somewhere?"

The other woman was, in fact, naked apart from her stilettoes. She leaned forward, bringing her breasts within millimetres of the brunette's face.

"Nah, can of pepper spray. Can you guess where I'm hiding it?" She smirked at Sara through lidded eyes.

"Gimme a break." Catherine cut through their moment, rolling her eyes.

"Done." Sara pushed unsteadily to her feet, tipped the stripper, and walked away.


	2. Chapter 2

It was only a few days before Sara made the decision. She had thought about going back to Ariane hundreds of times since she had left the other woman.

But going back would mean admitting that she had failed to find what she had left to look for. What Ariane told her she would never be able to find. Sara had suspected for a long time that her ex was right.

But she could not afford to be weak at work any more, she could not afford to feel – and so she needed the outlet, the predictability of what she had with Ariane.

When her ex opened the door to see Sara, she seemed mostly unsurprised. "It took longer than I thought." Ariane admitted by way of greeting. "You'll be punished for lying – you said you'd never be back. Do you understand now?"

"I understood then." Sara said with a shrug. "But I had to try."

Catherine watched the exotic and attractive woman Sara had brought to the party. Everyone had speculated on the nature of their relationship, most taking it as the confirmation of rumours that had been circulating about Sara since the bet. Clearly the woman was sociable, outgoing – and was currently making the circle of people standing with her laugh.

Catherine couldn't help thinking what it might have been like to attend functions as Sara's date. The morning after they had slept together had hinted at fun and easy interaction which had never returned after Sara found out about the bet.

"Sara doesn't look particularly happy." Gil Grissom mused, following her line of sight.

"Sara never looks happy." The blonde CSI responded glibly, although it took more effort than she wanted to admit to forget just how happy Sara had looked waking up next to her.

"Of course she does. I've seen her happy." Gil frowned.

"I admit I haven't seen her often enough to judge," Grissom's date Heather Kessler broke in, "but she seems somewhat withdrawn this evening. Have any of you met her lady friend before?"

"No." Catherine responded abruptly. "But it seems we're about to."

The lady in question was now making a confident beeline towards them.

"Hello Heather, good to see you again. And you must be Catherine and Dr Grissom. I'm Ariane." The woman looked like an ad for expensive perfume, jewellery, or sports cars. Catherine decided this was a good enough reason to hate her.

They all managed to spend a few minutes in friendly conversation courtesy of Heather and Catherine's social skills. Finally, Ariane wound it up.

"Well, nice to have met you – I'd better spend some time with Sara." She turned to go and paused. "Oh wait – before I forget, I hear I owe you a debt of thanks Ms Willows." She smiled again.

"Oh?" Catherine's face was frozen, having no idea where this line may lead.

"Yes," she chuckled in a friendly way that was setting the blonde's teeth on edge, "if you hadn't absolutely crushed what was left of Sara's self-esteem, she wouldn't let me do _half_ the fucked-up things I do to her." She shook her head and looked over at Sara with amusement. Turning back to them, she winked at Heather. "And mm, those things I make her do...I think we might cut out early. Goodbye." She strode away gracefully.

Grissom and Catherine stood in a little shock, trying to make sense of what they'd just heard.

"Did she just say..." Grissom trailed off, unsure if he'd imagined the entire conversation.

"Yeah. She really did." Catherine was frowning in confusion, trying to think of any possible alternate meaning to what had been said. They followed the guest with their eyes as she walked up and whispered something to Sara, who nodded seriously before saying her goodbyes and walking out with the other woman.

"How do you know her?" Catherine turned and asked Heather, who was looking pensive. The dominatrix just looked back at her.

"Through work, then." Catherine concluded. "But the Dominion or your psychology practice?" It was mostly a rhetorical question, as the blonde knew Heather took privacy seriously in both lines of work. "You would tell us if she was dangerous, though, right? I mean...you'd have to tell someone."

"All of my professional roles have a limit of that kind that requires reporting in certain circumstances. But you're also aware that as a psychologist, we can only report if we believe a patient has the intention of seriously harming themselves or others, and that in the dominion there is a certain amount of 'hurt' that is part of the job."

"And also that having met Ariane in either of those contexts doesn't mean you still see her. Dammit." Catherine bit her lip.

"It would seem best to ask Sara." Heather suggested.

"She...doesn't really trust me, at the moment." The blonde CSI admitted.

"And I was never very good at understanding Sara." Grissom shrugged.

"Does Ms Sidle have friends she can talk to?" The dominatrix pushed a little, having thought Gil and Catherine were Sara's closer friends.

"We don't really see her much outside of work." Catherine explained. "She hasn't mentioned anyone. But then, she didn't mention Ariane, either."

"That's somewhat less surprising though." Heather pointed out. "Yours does not seem the most welcoming industry for LGBTQI individuals to out themselves."

"Greg had been her closest friend." Catherine thought out loud. "But she'll barely talk to him now."

"Cutting off friendships is never a positive sign in romantic relationships." Heather turned to look at them. "I don't suppose you know when her relationship with Ariane began? If perhaps she was encouraged to withdraw from Greg?"

"No, there was a breach of trust." Grissom explained bluntly, and Catherine wanted to sink into the ground. "Greg's actions resulted in a difficult work situation for Sara. I'm hoping that as her work situation improves, her friendship with Greg will be restored."

"Watch her closely." Heather suggested. "Support her and be available for her to talk to. If there is anything wrong in her relationship, without friends she will feel trapped."


	3. Chapter 3

_See chapter 1 for disclaimer and warnings_

Lady Heather didn't hear the argument until she had already made her way down the staircase. There was music playing throughout her Dominion, but she also required that her reception and security remain low-profile even when refusing someone entry.

"Is there a problem?" She stepped forward to a room just to the side of the entryway and was intrigued to see Ariane Stack standing, relaxed and confident, inside.

"No problem – a simple misunderstanding which you can clear up for us." The visitor smiled.

Heather had not seen the former client in the weeks since the Law Enforcement gala and was a little surprised to see her now.

"I reminded Ms Stack that she was banned from the Dominion." Stephanie explained, having been assigned to greeting visitors. Her tension was only obvious to the domme because they had known each other for so long.

"Whereas I," Ariane spoke up with a playful glint in her eye, "remember the incident differently. Perhaps I misheard, but I believe when you kicked me out last time you said I was not welcome to play with any _of your staff_ ever again."

"I see." Heather remained impassive. "And what are you here for, if not for the services of my staff?"

"I was hoping to hire a room and equipment." Ariane explained. "I brought my own sub."

The Lady considered this proposal for a moment. She had banned Stack from the Dominion after the woman veered from the agreed scene and then repeatedly ignored an employee's use of her safe word – for the second time.

She didn't doubt for a moment that Ariane had all the space and equipment required for even complex scenes at home, which begged the question – what did she gain from coming to the Dominion, and was it better for Heather to play along and see what happened or to shut her games down immediately?

"Has your guest visited my Dominion before?" Heather enquired. "If not I will need to briefly interview them to discuss the rules as I do with all visitors. My decision about hiring a room will be subject to the outcome of the interview."

"Of course." Ariane responded graciously. "I'll send her in and wait outside for your response."

A few moments later, Heather was not surprised to see Sara Sidle enter. Nodding a greeting, the Lady turned to lead the way to a room with more privacy. "Follow me."

Making their way through the hallways and past rooms containing some of her noisier clients, Kessler kept an experienced eye on Sara's body language. She appeared relatively relaxed, and did not tense or otherwise react to the occasional scream or begging floating through the doors.

Once they entered a free room and were seated, Heather made her observation more obvious. Sidle still appeared comfortable and showed no difficulty holding her gaze.

"Has Ms Stack told you why she has brought you here today?" The owner began.

"Yes. She was hoping to hire a room and equipment for the two of us to play out a scene of dominance and submission." Sara answered calmly.

"Has she explained why no staff members will be involved in the scene?" The Lady pushed slightly.

"Yes. She told me she was banned from running scenes with your employees a few months ago after ignoring safe words."

"Can you explain to me why I should allow someone to jeopardise the safety of a guest in my Dominion?"

"I will sign any disclaimer you like assuming full responsibility for any injuries that occur as a result of my own decisions. I appreciate your concern for my well-being," the CSI noted with apparent honesty, "but you shouldn't worry. Ariane will not do anything to me which I have not agreed to." Sara finished.

"Miss Sidle..." Heather sighed, reluctant to compromise her professional demeanour but not convinced the visitor knew what she was getting into. "What makes you so sure Ms Stack will not cross your boundaries and ignore your wishes, especially as it has happened at least twice here before?"

"Because we have an agreement." Sidle admitted. "And because I have no boundaries."

* * *

Ariane was still waiting outside leaning against her car when Lady Heather stepped out. She appeared care-free and patient, but the Lady knew better than anyone that appearances could be deceiving.

"I've decided to hire you the room and equipment on one condition." The owner announced to the pair when she and Sara were both close enough to be heard.

"Oh?" Ariane prompted, intrigued.

"I will be in the room to observe. If Miss Sidle safe-words and you do not stop I will contact security and you will never set foot in the Dominion again." Kessler stated firmly.

Stack just laughed. "You'll be getting quite an eye-full. I will enjoy showing you what an obedient sub I've got. What do you say, Sara? Do you mind having an audience?"

"I agree to your terms, Lady Heather." Sidle responded, not quite answering the actual question.

"Excellent." Ariane rubbed her hands together with genuine enthusiasm. "This is going to be_ fun_."


	4. Chapter 4

_Please see chapter 1 for disclaimer and general warnings. _

_Chapter warning: Sexual references, including to fetish and bdsm, although nothing explicitly described or discussed in detail. Coarse and potentially offensive language_

* * *

Ariane and Sara's dynamic was unlike almost any dominance and submission Heather had ever seen.

For most couples engaging in a scene, attitudes and behaviour were a crucial aspect of their enjoyment. Submissives enjoyed the pretense of giving all control to another, of obeying another's wishes, of being rewarded for obedience and punished for disobedience. Dominants enjoyed the pretense of doing whatever they pleased, of being fully in control and readily obeyed.

While Sara was certainly quick to obey any of Ariane's instructions, her attitude was not in the least bit deferential. This in itself was not unheard of – Heather had encountered many brats before who enjoyed pushing against boundaries before being put in their place. But rather than punishing her sub for the attitude, Ariane seemed amused by Sara's sarcastic comments, trading jibes with her at every opportunity.

It was not at all what Heather had been expecting. Although Ariane's creative mix of pain, pleasure and humiliation was definitely anticipated, the cold unconcern she had shown in the past to Heather's employees was missing. Ariane appeared to be genuinely invested in Sara's reactions, delighting in how much punishment she could take, or frustrated if her actions produced no response at all.

Sara wasn't exactly immune to it. She cried out in pain and pleasure, not resisting either, and seemed to shrug off any attempt at humiliation. The best description the Lady could think of was that Sara seemed unconcerned by it all. Heather began to wonder if Ariane's actual goal was to find something which would make Sidle safe-word.

"Fuck Heather." Ariane groaned. "Isn't she delicious? She'll do absolutely anything, let me do anything to her. If you've ever wanted to piss on an officer of law enforcement, now's the time." Stack's eyes sparkled with a twisted form of mischief. "No? Or anything else you can think of. I'm feeling generous after being allowed to use my pet in such an esteemed location."

"It's not like you just topped me in the Oval Office Ariane." Sara pointed out. "No offense, Heather."

"Well now you've given me a goal in life, sweetheart." The domme tugged at Sara's hair absently as she gestured grandly with the other hand.

"Becoming President? It beats the hell out of your old 'weirdest role-plays' ambition."

"I admit, in retrospect, that 'the Walrus and the Carpenter' was a bit of a stretch. Although you do look lovely wearing only a tool belt. And with nails hammered through your palms." She paused thoughtfully. "That was a joke," Ariane continued, clarifying for Heather, "the poem doesn't mention anything about nails. We did eat oysters and make creative use of the handle of a hammer, though."

Sara rolled her eyes. "You'll get kicked out again. Heather isn't used to your lack of humour."

Heather didn't show it, but she was actually more astonished by the sub trading quips with the woman who, amongst other things, had just whipped her painfully, choked her to the point of gasping and offered her up for urination play with an almost-stranger.

Many of Heather's guests would be excited to undergo such things, or even willing to do them because they enjoyed being dominated. But Sara didn't seem excited, or submissive, or anything else. The two might as well have been at the supermarket.

"Lack of humour?" Ariane demanded in mock offence. "I'm so funny I _am_ the punchline! You're the joke."

"Interesting analogy." Heather finally chose to speak up, previously avoiding being drawn into the scene. "A punchline without a joke..."

"Is meaningless." Stack finished her thought with a smile and a nod. "Of course that assumes I was making an analogy, not just general word-play. But it seems our time is up. You should have taken me up on my offer Heather, my fucktoy is one of a kind."

Much later, when time permitted, Heather allowed herself time to consider the two women and how they interacted. She could not decide whether there was an actual cause for concern or if Stack's comments were just a particularly distasteful way of showing off her girlfriend.

* * *

Catherine could not get Ariane's words out of her head. _The fucked-up things I do to her. _The blonde had mostly been focussing on giving Sara her space after her initial attempts at apologies and explanations had fallen flat, but in the weeks after meeting Sara's girlfriend, she couldn't bring herself to stay away any longer.

Grissom seemed to have independently reached the same conclusion, and inevitably partnered the two women on a case for the first time since they'd slept together.

Catherine was determined not to tread on eggshells but to be herself. She wasn't going to try to 'buy' forgiveness, although it was certainly tempting - she still felt horribly guilty. But Catherine was fairly confident Sara wouldn't appreciate that any more than her overtures at the club, so did her best to act like nothing had changed.

She had vaguely expected the two of them would get into arguments throughout the day about anything from which area of the scene to process, to theories on what took place, to who would drive on the way back to the lab.

She even considered that Sara might go out of her way to ignore or avoid interaction, and was fully prepared to call her on it. Catherine had not expected the polite, distant professionalism that Sidle maintained throughout processing the scene and the drive back to the lab.

It set Catherine's teeth on edge. She had argued with Sara any number of times about cases in the past, and had always believed it was because they were both passionate about their jobs, about helping people. It had never really occurred to her that it was a kind of sign of friendship or closeness until she now felt the complete absence of it.

She even tried disagreeing with Sara later in the shift to spark debate. The brunette had just nodded thoughtfully and shrugged it off, saying that time would tell, or that the results they were waiting on might clear things up.

Finally Catherine couldn't handle it, and at the end of their shift she cornered Sara in the locker room.

"Look, I know it's not my place to say anything because of what happened." Catherine began. "But your date to the gala said something weird, and I've been worried." The blonde was expecting either anger at her presumption or nervous gestures that might suggest her co-worker was keeping secrets, like being terrified of her girlfriend.

But Sara just turned and cocked her head. "Oh? What did Ariane say?"

"That your self-esteem was crushed and so you let her do fucked-up things to you."

"So what are you worried about?" Sara asked.

"Well...that she's hurting you somehow!" Catherine felt awkward and a little defensive putting voice to it. While 'doing fucked up things' definitely implied something sinister, it certainly didn't amount to a specific accusation.

"Well, she hasn't used me as a trophy-screw. So let's just say she's hurt me less than the last woman I took to bed." Sara said with a careless shrug, shouldering her bag. "See you tomorrow, Catherine."

She walked out of the room, and Willows didn't try to stop her.

Catherine was stunned, not so much by having her mistakes thrown in her face as by how Sara had said it. Catherine couldn't remember Sara ever admitting to being hurt by anything before.


End file.
